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Old 03-01-2005, 06:46 PM   #1
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Default For the americans on this forum...

here's some more jokes...

I really do love this country, but...

1. Only in America... can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.

2. Only in America... are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink.

3. Only in America... do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

4. Only in America... do people order double cheese burgers, large fries, and a diet coke.

5. Only in America... do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.

6. Only in America... do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.

7. Only in America... do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.

8. Only in America... do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.

9. Only in America... do we use the word 'politics' to describe the process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures'.

10. Only in America... do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille.
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Old 03-01-2005, 06:52 PM   #2
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Default Re: For the americans on this forum...

LOL! HILARIOUS! These are soooooo true. I can't stop laughing! They're funny because they're true! LOL!
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Old 03-01-2005, 07:07 PM   #3
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Default Re: For the americans on this forum...

definitly!
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Old 03-01-2005, 07:10 PM   #4
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LMAO.. the double cheese burger, fries and diet coke was the best.
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Old 03-01-2005, 08:14 PM   #5
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Default Re: For the americans on this forum...

Some of those aren't so true, but funny indeed.
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Old 03-01-2005, 08:17 PM   #6
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the hot dog and bun thing always gets me.
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Old 03-01-2005, 08:19 PM   #7
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Default Re: For the americans on this forum...

"can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance."

This one is certainly not true. Around here an ambulance takes about 5 minutes tops (cause the hospital is near).. and the last time I ordered Pizza it took 50 minutes. Darn college frats lol...
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Old 03-01-2005, 08:47 PM   #8
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Default Re: For the americans on this forum...

LmFaO
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Old 03-01-2005, 08:52 PM   #9
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Default Re: For the americans on this forum...

Giancarlo, definately depends on your situation.... it's quite possible to have a Pizza hut a couple blocks from your house, and the nearest hospital on the other side of the town.

But yeah, good stuff.
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Old 03-01-2005, 09:21 PM   #10
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Default Re: For the americans on this forum...

The pizza hut is only a few blocks away from me.
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Old 03-01-2005, 09:41 PM   #11
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Default Re: For the americans on this forum...

The nearest hospital is about 10-15 min drive from my house and the nearest pizza parlor is about 5 min drive away. But, Ambulances have a special right of way when driving and pizza deliverers don't.
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Old 03-01-2005, 09:41 PM   #12
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Default Re: For the americans on this forum...

Who cares, they were funny to some, not funny to others...leave it at that.
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Old 03-01-2005, 10:41 PM   #13
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freakin cracked me up..AGAIN! oh btw...one more post and im no longer a newbie
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Old 03-02-2005, 09:28 AM   #14
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Default Re: For the americans on this forum...

Now that's what i'm talking bout..LMAO !! Now those were very true..
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Old 03-02-2005, 09:32 AM   #15
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Default Re: For the americans on this forum...

there not that funny but they sure are true lol
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Old 03-03-2005, 12:39 AM   #16
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Default Re: For the americans on this forum...

yea, these are hilarious. Got any ones for "Only in United Kingdom..."?
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Old 03-03-2005, 01:41 AM   #17
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Default Re: For the americans on this forum...

Heaps of those are the same in Australia, escpecially the Ambulance one.
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Old 03-03-2005, 07:54 AM   #18
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Default Re: For the americans on this forum...

lol
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Old 03-03-2005, 11:11 AM   #19
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Default Re: For the americans on this forum...

10. Only in America... do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille.

never noticed that before!!
Makes me wonder why there is brail in the first place as a blind person could not erad the screen in order to see what their balance was, or o know how much they were taking out!
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Old 03-03-2005, 11:51 AM   #20
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Default Re: For the americans on this forum...

lol funny stuff, you Yanks crack me up sometimes
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