I see. I asked because I think Boston-ian accent is cool.
As for the topic, I had the same problem with my HP laptop. To solve it, I downloaded all drivers separately, re-partitioned the HDD (later replaced it with SSD), and installed Win7 from scratch (OS was Win7 and now I upgraded it to Win10 successfully).
I used the activation key found on the sticker on the back. It is the incompetent HP backup system that caused this problem. The best way I can think of to counter this is to re-partition the HDD, get rid of the backup partition to avoid booting problems, and install Win8.1 with the drivers from HP website. That's if you are welling to lose the warranty, or if it is already passed.
Get a Win8.1 installation media of the same version (e.g. Pro x64), install it and use the activation key. It should work. For my Win7, I downloaded an official ISO from MS.
I suggest taking a system image (has to be in the root of another partition) of a the fresh installed Win8.1, upgrade to a clean Win10, and try the new Bitdefender. Then before updating Windows, disable on Win10 whatever Bitdefender provides; e.g. firewall and/or Windows Defender. If it fails again, use roll back to Win8.1 with the system image and install the drivers and other stuff.
The process could take so much time and effort. I recommend you start building experience starting with this one. We can help you here with every step.