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Old 07-03-2007, 11:28 PM   #341
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Default Re: Jokes Thread

You Might be a REDNECK if

You and your dog use the same tree.

You believe dual air bags refer
to your wife and mother-in-law.

You think the OJ Trial was a
Sunkist and Minutemaid taste test.

Your whole family is Democrats
'cept little Mary.
She lernt how to read.

You think fast food is hitting a possum at 65 mph.

You take a six-pack cooler to church.

The blue book value of your truck goes up and down
depending on how much gas it has in it.

The third grade teacher says little Bubba
could be a mathematical genius
because he's got thirteen fingers.

Fifth grade was the best six years of your life.

You think loading the dishwasher
means getting your wife drunk.

Heres some other jokes

Womens rights... HAHA

or if you've heard Dane cook, you've heard these pranks...
Next time you go to a bank and you are waiting in line, tap the person in front of you on the shoulder, pull out a pair of gloves, start putting them on and say...

Now would be a good time too leave...

Or, when you are at an airport, walk over near someone sitting down, wait til they notice you there, and when they look up at you, look them straight in the eye and say, "Dont get on the flight" And walk away.
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Old 07-04-2007, 01:01 AM   #342
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Hey man calm down with all the sexisisiisism... If it wasn't for a woman you wouldn't be here...

... neither could you get a good sandwich.
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Old 07-04-2007, 05:48 AM   #343
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Thats a good point If it wasnt for us women you wouldnt be here! Thats how superia you guys are! Haha We are your creator!!!! ...muhahaha....
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Old 07-04-2007, 05:52 AM   #344
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Default Re: Jokes Thread

A man walks into a bar - he sits down and orders a drink. The barman gives him his drink, accompanied by a bowl of peanuts. To his surprise, a voice comes from the peanut bowl. "You look great tonight!" it said, "You really look fantastic... and that aftershave is just wonderful!"

The man is obviously a little confused, but tries to ignore it.
Realising he has no cigarettes he wanders over to the cigarette
machine. After inserting his money, another voice emits from the
machine. "You're a total idiot... My God you STINK... Do you know, you're almost as ugly as your mother!"

By now, the man is extremely perplexed. He turns to the barman for an explanation. "Ah yes sir," the barman responds, "The peanuts are complimentary, but the cigarette machine is out of order."
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Old 07-04-2007, 06:07 AM   #345
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Steff View Post
Thats a good point If it wasnt for us women you wouldnt be here! Thats how superia you guys are! Haha We are your creator!!!! ...muhahaha....
In the bible it says that man created woman out of a pair of his riibs & don't you forget it!! inferior being!! muhahaha
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Old 07-04-2007, 06:16 AM   #346
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Either way the population would of still died with out us! haha
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Old 07-04-2007, 06:20 AM   #347
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A man walks into a bar orders a beer & a whisky chaser, drinks the beer & pours the whisky into his top pocket, this happened three times, the bartender couldn't stand it no longer & asked him why he did that, the guy asked, d'you want a punch on the nose?, at that, a mouse looked out of the pocket, hiccupped & said yeah an' that goes fer ya cat too!!
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Old 07-04-2007, 06:23 AM   #348
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Quote:
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Either way the population would of still died with out us! haha
No no woman, man is skilled at constructing things [thank goodness]
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Old 07-04-2007, 07:52 AM   #349
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Steff View Post
Either way the population would of still died with out us! haha
True that, the fact is "we men would go crazy without women"...hahahha !!
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Old 07-04-2007, 07:53 AM   #350
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ~mr mixx~ View Post
True that, the fact is "we men would go crazy without women"...hahahha !!
Yeah, and crazy with them
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