Go Back   Computer Forums > Welcome To Computer Forums .org > Social Lounge | Off Topic
Join Computer forums Today


Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
 
Old 11-19-2014, 06:05 AM   #41
Fully Optimized
 
Smart_Guy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Saudi Arabia
Posts: 2,121
Default Re: Jokes N Stuff!

Scientists wanted to make an experiment and find out what an American, a Japanese and a Saudi brains look like.

Sample 1, an American man:
They opened his skull up and found a high-end computer.

Sample 2, a Japanese man:
... opened his skull and found a floating microchip.

Sample 3, a Saudi man:
... opened his skull and found nothing but a thread hanging all the way from the left side to the right side of the brain cavity. What is this, they wondered. How about we cut it and see what happens, one suggested. They cut the thread and his ears fell off.
__________________

__________________
My main rig (click here).
Smart_Guy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-19-2014, 04:53 PM   #42
..m.0,0.m..
Site Team
 
iPwn's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2010
Location: USA
Posts: 3,675
Default Re: Jokes N Stuff!

^

+1 Doesn't matter who you are, that's funny!
__________________

__________________
Humans are the only creatures that won't live up to the their potential. Give everything your all. When you die, die on E.

So I ask you, what do you intend to do now?
iPwn is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-19-2014, 05:21 PM   #43
Fully Optimized
 
Draygoes's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: United States
Posts: 1,636
Default Re: Jokes N Stuff!

Totally agree!
__________________
Working on new projects and expanding our horizons. Come by and see what we're up to now. www.multirotorplatforms.com/forum.php
Draygoes is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-20-2014, 02:01 AM   #44
Fully Optimized
 
Smart_Guy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Saudi Arabia
Posts: 2,121
Default Re: Jokes N Stuff!

Well at least now I know what's holding my ears up
__________________
My main rig (click here).
Smart_Guy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-20-2014, 04:27 AM   #45
Fully Optimized
 
BikerEcho's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Denmark
Posts: 3,907
Default Re: Jokes N Stuff!

Haha. I have heard that joke before. However It was aimed at blonde woman instead of Saudi Arabians.
__________________
MOBO: Asus Maximus 6 Hero - GPU: Gigabyte GTX 980ti xtreme - CPU: I7-4770K - PSU: Corsair AX760
RAM: Corsair Vantage 2x4GB - SSD: Samsung 840 Evo 512GB - Case: NZXT H440
BikerEcho is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-20-2014, 04:47 AM   #46
Fully Optimized
 
Smart_Guy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Saudi Arabia
Posts: 2,121
Default Re: Jokes N Stuff!

Quote:
Originally Posted by BikerEcho View Post
Haha. I have heard that joke before. However It was aimed at blonde woman instead of Saudi Arabians.
I see some blonde jokes coming

---------- Post added at 12:47 PM ---------- Previous post was at 12:44 PM ----------

Wait, there was one already:

Quote:
Originally Posted by Smart_Guy View Post
Brunette: please call me a cab.

Blonde: you're a cab.

Brunette: *face palm* I can't blame you. It's in your genes.

Blonde: *searches in the pockets of her jeans pants and says there is nothing in her Jeans*
__________________
My main rig (click here).
Smart_Guy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-20-2014, 08:32 AM   #47
Fully Optimized
 
Draygoes's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: United States
Posts: 1,636
Default Re: Jokes N Stuff!

I actually opened with two blond jokes when this thread started, but as far as blond jokes go, this will always have a place close to me heart.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Draygoes View Post
An old blind cowboy wanders into an all-girl biker bar by mistake...
He finds his way to a bar stool and orders a shot of Jack Daniels.
After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender, 'Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?'
The bar immediately falls absolutely silent.
In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says, 'Before you tell that joke, Cowboy, I think it is only fair, given that you are blind, that you should know five things:
1. The bartender is a blonde girl with a baseball bat.
2. The bouncer is a blonde girl with a 'Billy-Club'.
3. I'm a 6-foot tall, 175-pound blonde woman with a black belt in karate.
4. The woman sitting next to me is blonde and a professional weight lifter.
5. The lady to your right is blonde and a professional wrestler.
'Now, think about it seriously, Cowboy.... Do you still wanna tell that blonde joke?'
The blind cowboy thinks for a second, shakes his head and mutters, 'No...not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times............'
__________________
Working on new projects and expanding our horizons. Come by and see what we're up to now. www.multirotorplatforms.com/forum.php
Draygoes is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-20-2014, 09:27 AM   #48
Fully Optimized
 
Draygoes's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: United States
Posts: 1,636
Default Re: Jokes N Stuff!

A DEA officer stops at a ranch in Texas, and talks with an old rancher. He tells the rancher, "I need to inspect your ranch for illegally grown drugs." The rancher says, "Okay, but don't go in that field over there," as he points out the location.

The DEA officer verbally explodes saying, "Mister, I have the authority of the Federal Government with me." Reaching into his rear pants pocket, he removes his badge and proudly displays it to the rancher. "See this badge? This badge means I am allowed to go wherever I wish . On any land. No questions asked or answers given. Have I made myself clear? Do you understand? "

A short time later, the old rancher hears loud screams and sees the DEA officer running for his life chased by the rancher's big Santa Gertrudis bull.

With every step the bull is gaining ground on the officer, and it seems likely that he'll get gored before he reaches safety. The officer is clearly terrified. The rancher throws down his tools, runs to the fence and yells at the top of his lungs .

"Your badge. Show him your BADGE!"
__________________
Working on new projects and expanding our horizons. Come by and see what we're up to now. www.multirotorplatforms.com/forum.php
Draygoes is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-20-2014, 07:10 PM   #49
The Candy Man
 
~mr mixx~'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: USA
Posts: 10,854
Default Re: Jokes N Stuff!

Nice one guys....those are awesome !!

Cop: Did you know drinking and driving is aganist the law?
Me: Then why is there parking lots at the bar?
(cop is speachless)

----------------------------------------------

How guys propose: On one knee.
How girls propose: "I'm pregnant!"

---------------------------------------------

I like how the Ninja Turtles wear masks. Good way to hide your identity. I mean, its not like your a giant f-----g turtle or anything.

---------------------------------------------

I was driving earlier and some woman pulled out in front of me. Then I saw that she was texting and driving. I was so mad that I threw my beer at her!
__________________
" Let the music move you "
~mr mixx~ is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 11-21-2014, 05:49 AM   #50
Fully Optimized
 
Smart_Guy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Saudi Arabia
Posts: 2,121
Default Re: Jokes N Stuff!

An Englishman went to USA and crossed a two-way street looking at the right side which made him not notice a car coming. The driver managed to hit the breaks early but still hit the Englishman lightly and put him down non injured.

The driver got off the car, checked on him, found him fine and asked him noticing he was an Englishman and asked him: "bro, did you come here all the way from the UK to die?", the English man replied back to him: "no mate, I came he yesterday".

Got it? "to die" as in the British "today" and yesterday as in "yus-tuh-die"?

Quote:
Originally Posted by ~mr mixx~ View Post

I like how the Ninja Turtles wear masks. Good way to hide your identity. I mean, its not like your a giant f----g turtle or anything.
You just said the F word
__________________

__________________
My main rig (click here).
Smart_Guy is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off



All times are GMT -5. The time now is 10:02 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 4
Copyright ©2000 - 2016, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Friendly URLs by vBSEO 3.6.0