Go Back   Computer Forums > Welcome To Computer Forums .org > Social Lounge | Off Topic
Join Computer forums Today


Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
 
Old 09-12-2015, 03:12 PM   #391
Fully Optimized
 
Celery's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: USA
Posts: 2,041
Default Re: Jokes N Stuff!

How gross.
__________________

__________________
I yam what I yam
Celery is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-13-2015, 11:39 AM   #392
Fully Optimized
 
Smart_Guy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Saudi Arabia
Posts: 2,120
Default Re: Jokes N Stuff!

An anesthesia doctor (or whatever they are called) asked a women about her age:

Doc.: How old are you? This is important to give the dosage.
Woman: 25

Doc.: Accurate dosage is given depending on age. You sure?
Woman: It's 30

Doc.: It could cause serious side effects.
Woman: Okay, 38.

Doc.: wrong dosage could cause paralysis.
Woman: look, I'm 48. I'm not gonna add more even if it causes death!
__________________

__________________
My main rig (click here).
Smart_Guy is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 09-13-2015, 10:32 PM   #393
The Candy Man
 
~mr mixx~'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: USA
Posts: 10,853
Default Re: Jokes N Stuff!

Relationships are a lot like algebra. Have you ever looked at your X and wondered Y?

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Why are married women heavier than single women? A: Single women comes home, see what’s in the fridge and go to bed. Married women come home, see what’s in bed and go to the fridge.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

What’s the difference between beer nuts and deer nuts? Beer nuts are $1.39, and deer nuts are under a buck.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Yo Mama is so bald, when you rub her head, you can see into the future.
__________________
" Let the music move you "
~mr mixx~ is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-22-2015, 01:40 PM   #394
Fully Optimized
 
Smart_Guy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Saudi Arabia
Posts: 2,120
Default Re: Jokes N Stuff!

Wife went on vacation and told irresponsible husband to take care of her cat and old father.

The next day she called and this conversation took place:

Wife: Hi, how's the cat doing?

Husband: The cat is dead.

Wife: Oh m god, what's wrong with you? You could tell me this time that she's playing in the living room then the next day I call that she's sleeping on the sofa then sometime later that she died... why did you have to scare me like that in my first call and ruin my vacation? Anyways, how's my dad doing?

Husband: Um... he's playing in the living room.
__________________
My main rig (click here).
Smart_Guy is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 10-22-2015, 03:33 PM   #395
Fully Optimized
 
BikerEcho's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Denmark
Posts: 3,907
Default Re: Jokes N Stuff!

Ohh i get it. XD
Didn't know you had a dark sense of humor smart guy.
__________________
MOBO: Asus Maximus 6 Hero - GPU: Gigabyte GTX 980ti xtreme - CPU: I7-4770K - PSU: Corsair AX760
RAM: Corsair Vantage 2x4GB - SSD: Samsung 840 Evo 512GB - Case: NZXT H440
BikerEcho is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 10-22-2015, 05:48 PM   #396
Fully Optimized
 
strollin's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: USA
Posts: 1,613
Default Re: Jokes N Stuff!

Even though you pretty much know what the punchline will be as soon as the wife tells the husband not to come right out and tell her that the cat is dead, it's still pretty funny.
strollin is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-22-2015, 07:23 PM   #397
Fully Optimized
 
Smart_Guy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Saudi Arabia
Posts: 2,120
Default Re: Jokes N Stuff!

I wonder if the wife called two more time later asking about her father
__________________
My main rig (click here).
Smart_Guy is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 10-24-2015, 06:21 PM   #398
Baseband Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Australia
Posts: 46
Default Re: Jokes N Stuff!

I've just seen a great offer on Amazon - if you buy all Adam & The Ants sheet music, they'll throw in a stand & deliver.
spellunker is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-30-2015, 08:51 AM   #399
Fully Optimized
 
Smart_Guy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Saudi Arabia
Posts: 2,120
Default Re: Jokes N Stuff!



It's official, I'm not getting married

This woman in the pic looks hot tho

---------- Post added at 03:51 PM ---------- Previous post was at 03:46 PM ----------

Wife: Where are you?
Husband: Oh, I'm with my mother.
Wife: Okay, finish whatever your doing and come back home. You mother is here with us.

God have mercy on the husband's soul
__________________
My main rig (click here).
Smart_Guy is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 10-30-2015, 09:02 AM   #400
Fully Optimized
 
BikerEcho's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Denmark
Posts: 3,907
Default Re: Jokes N Stuff!


__________________

__________________
MOBO: Asus Maximus 6 Hero - GPU: Gigabyte GTX 980ti xtreme - CPU: I7-4770K - PSU: Corsair AX760
RAM: Corsair Vantage 2x4GB - SSD: Samsung 840 Evo 512GB - Case: NZXT H440
BikerEcho is online now   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off



All times are GMT -5. The time now is 06:07 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 4
Copyright ©2000 - 2016, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Friendly URLs by vBSEO 3.6.0