Go Back   Computer Forums > Welcome To Computer Forums .org > Social Lounge | Off Topic
Join Computer forums Today


Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
 
Old 01-08-2015, 05:10 PM   #111
Daemon Poster
 
YoungIT's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: USA
Posts: 661
Default Re: Jokes N Stuff!

A blonde walked into a library, walked to the librarian, and said "Hello, I would like a cheeseburger and french fries" in a loud voice.

The librarian whispered back to the blonde "Oh my god, are you crazy? This is a library!"

The blonde whispered back "Oh my god I'm so sorry! I would like a cheeseburger and french fries."

__________________

__________________
"Difficulties mastered are opportunities won" -Sir Winston S. Churchill
YoungIT is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-08-2015, 05:16 PM   #112
Fully Optimized
 
Celery's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: USA
Posts: 2,047
Default Re: Jokes N Stuff!

That remind's me:

An Aggie just got his diploma and wanted to celebrate so he walked up to the counter and said, "Yo barkeep, pour me a stiff one. I've just graduated and I'm celebrating!"

The owner looked at him and said, "let me guess, you're from A&M right?"

"yeah, how'd you guess?"

"This is a hardware store."
__________________

__________________
I yam what I yam
Celery is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-08-2015, 05:29 PM   #113
Fully Optimized
 
Draygoes's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: United States
Posts: 1,636
Default Re: Jokes N Stuff!

LOL Both nice!
__________________
Working on new projects and expanding our horizons. Come by and see what we're up to now. www.multirotorplatforms.com/forum.php
Draygoes is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-08-2015, 10:01 PM   #114
The Candy Man
 
~mr mixx~'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: USA
Posts: 10,857
Default Re: Jokes N Stuff!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Draygoes View Post
Umm... why did the chicken cross the road?
Because he was too chicken s**t to cross the highway...
__________________
" Let the music move you "
~mr mixx~ is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-09-2015, 02:05 AM   #115
Fully Optimized
 
Smart_Guy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Saudi Arabia
Posts: 2,121
Default Re: Jokes N Stuff!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Draygoes View Post
Can I borrow that? I am going to borrow that...
It's all yours
__________________
My main rig (click here).
Smart_Guy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-13-2015, 03:09 AM   #116
Fully Optimized
 
Draygoes's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: United States
Posts: 1,636
Default Re: Jokes N Stuff!

Grandad remembering the good old days...

When i was a boy, my Momma would send me
down to the corner store with $1, and
I'd come come back with:

5 bags of potatoes,
2 loaves of bread,
3 bottles of milk,
a hunk of cheese,
a box of tea and
6 eggs.

You can't do that now.
Too many fu*kin cameras.
__________________
Working on new projects and expanding our horizons. Come by and see what we're up to now. www.multirotorplatforms.com/forum.php
Draygoes is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-13-2015, 06:13 AM   #117
Golden Master
 
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Australia
Posts: 7,224
Send a message via Skype™ to BK_123
Default Re: Jokes N Stuff!

An Italian, a Scotsman, and a Chinese fellow were hired at a construction site. The foreman pointed out a huge pile of sand and told the Italian guy, "You're in charge of sweeping." To the Scotsman he said, "You're in charge of shoveling." And to the Chinese guy, "You're in charge of supplies."
He then said, "Now, I have to leave for a little while. I expect you guys to make a dent in that there pile."
The foreman went away for a of couple hours, and, when he returned, the pile of sand was untouched. He asked the Italian, "Why didn't you sweep any of it?" The Italian replied, "I no hava no broom. You said to the Chinese fella that he a wasa in a charge of supplies, but he hasa disappeared and I no coulda finda him nowhere." Then the foreman turned to the Scotsman and said, "And you, I thought I told you to shovel this pile."
The Scotsman replied, "Aye, ye did lad, boot ah couldnay get meself a shoovel! Ye left th' Chinese gadgie in chairge of supplies, boot ah couldnay fin' him either." The foreman was really angry by now and stormed off toward the pile of sand to look for the Chinese guy.

Just then, the Chinese guy jumped out from behind the pile of sand and yelled...

"SUPPLIES!!"
__________________
See all my PC spec's here https://bit.ly/1lWAJhz
BK_123 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-13-2015, 10:46 AM   #118
Fully Optimized
 
Smart_Guy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Saudi Arabia
Posts: 2,121
Default Re: Jokes N Stuff!

American enters a bar and finds two ladies speaking English in a way he's not familiar with. He gets close and asks: "Are you girls from Scotland?". One of them looks at him with anger and says: "Wales you idiot". The man says with a puzzled face after a long pause: "Oh, um, are you whales from Scotland?"

Moral: don't go to bars and act cool to girls.
__________________
My main rig (click here).
Smart_Guy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-19-2015, 04:01 AM   #119
Fully Optimized
 
Draygoes's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: United States
Posts: 1,636
Default Re: Jokes N Stuff!

NSFW!

Ok. I do not remember where I learned this from, and the details from it are somewhat unclear... So, I present to you, the version of the joke that has gotten quite a few laughs even though it is not the entire joke. (I am typing the jest of it from memory.)


A white man, a black man, and a chinese man are driving down the highway when they see a sign that says "Will pay $10000.00 USD to the person that can produce a blue baby with my wife."

The white man goes in, and 9 months later produces a white baby.
The black man goes in, and 9 months later produces a black baby.
The chienese man goes in, and 9 months later was able to produce a black baby.

The white and black men ask him how he did it and he responds...

Me chinese, me think quick, me put Windex on me d*ck!

P.S.
Why do the spoiler tags not work?
__________________
Working on new projects and expanding our horizons. Come by and see what we're up to now. www.multirotorplatforms.com/forum.php
Draygoes is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-19-2015, 10:34 AM   #120
Fully Optimized
 
Celery's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: USA
Posts: 2,047
Default Re: Jokes N Stuff!

Me think you made a mistake Draygoes.
__________________

__________________
I yam what I yam
Celery is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off



All times are GMT -5. The time now is 05:51 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 4
Copyright ©2000 - 2016, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Friendly URLs by vBSEO 3.6.0