Crazy Computer Stories

[The_Lucas]

I had a customer who came in and told me her mouse was dead. I asked her if she had it with her, but she said she was sure I didn't want to see it. I insisted, and out comes a computer mouse that was very custom. Some genius (or idiot) had taken a stuffed mouse (real) and removed the taxidermy stuff and placed the skin over a wood frame and added electronics. Cool mouse, but the "genius" had also put a vibrator in it (maybe for gaming purposes?) and one day while the customer wasn't home, it must've went off and her cat found it. You know the rest. A realistic mouse vibrating across the desk...Well, eventually it ended up in the litter box along with some regurgitated wires. The cat was a little crazy after that, which I attribute to possible electrical shock.
I was ROFL when she left.

That's taking things literally and making it into something cool. More people need to do that.

 

[Lowndsey]

I had a customer who came in and told me her mouse was dead. I asked her if she had it with her, but she said she was sure I didn't want to see it. I insisted, and out comes a computer mouse that was very custom. Some genius (or idiot) had taken a stuffed mouse (real) and removed the taxidermy stuff and placed the skin over a wood frame and added electronics. Cool mouse, but the "genius" had also put a vibrator in it (maybe for gaming purposes?) and one day while the customer wasn't home, it must've went off and her cat found it. You know the rest. A realistic mouse vibrating across the desk...Well, eventually it ended up in the litter box along with some regurgitated wires. The cat was a little crazy after that, which I attribute to possible electrical shock.
I was ROFL when she left.

That's taking things literally and making it into something cool. More people need to do that.

yeah I am calling bs

 

[Neodude1123201]

Yeah Same here...

 

[Lowndsey]

I had a customer who came in and told me her mouse was dead. I asked her if she had it with her, but she said she was sure I didn't want to see it. I insisted, and out comes a computer mouse that was very custom. Some genius (or idiot) had taken a stuffed mouse (real) and removed the taxidermy stuff and placed the skin over a wood frame and added electronics. Cool mouse, but the "genius" had also put a vibrator in it (maybe for gaming purposes?) and one day while the customer wasn't home, it must've went off and her cat found it. You know the rest. A realistic mouse vibrating across the desk...Well, eventually it ended up in the litter box along with some regurgitated wires. The cat was a little crazy after that, which I attribute to possible electrical shock.
I was ROFL when she left.

That's taking things literally and making it into something cool. More people need to do that.

What do you get out of making up lies?

 

[LukaszR1]

First post was funny...I can't believe someone in their right mind, would actually think that putting an "electric" component would cool it off, and not risk FIRE

LOL

 

[TheRatBeard]

lol Congrats you made my day!

 

[fast400ex]

When I worked at a local Tech Store, the boss and I were standing in the front when an 'older' woman walked in with her computer. She sat it on the counter and the boss asked her what was wrong with it. Without hesitation she looked up at both of us and said her cup holder broke. I looked at him and he looked at me and we were both kind of confused. He asked her what she meant and she spun the computer around on the counter so the front of it was facing us and as she pointed to the CD Tray, repeated 'my cup holder broke when I put my coffee mug on it this morning'. I had to run to the back of the store to keep from laughing. I was still in earshot and got to listen as the boss tried his best to keep from laughing while he explained that the CD Tray isn't a cup holder and that it's for CD's. He then of course had to explain what a CD was. Once she left, he came back and we both had a good laugh about it and he was ragging on me for leaving him stranded up there by himself explaining all that too her.

that reminds me of this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fAO77skO4Jw

 

[berry120]

Not my story of course, but it's probably the most classic one out there for those who haven't heard it. Internet legend has it it's actually a real call to the wordperfect helpdesk, and yes the employer did get fired as a result - but apparently hired somewhere else quickly afterwards!

"Welch Hall computer assistant; may I help you?"

"Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."

"What sort of trouble?"

"Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away."

"Went away?"

"They disappeared."

"Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?"

"Nothing."

"Nothing?"

"It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."

"Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?"

"How do I tell?"

[Uh-oh. Well, let's give it a try anyway.] "Can you see the C:\ prompt on the screen?"

"What's a sea-prompt?"

[Uh-huh, thought so. Let's try a different tack.] "Never mind. Can you move the cursor around on the screen?"

"There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type."

[Ah--at least he knows what a cursor is. Sounds like a hardware problem. I wonder if he's kicked out his monitor's power plug.] "Does your monitor have a power indicator?"

"What's a monitor?"

"It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on?"

"I don't know."

"Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that?"

[sound of rustling and jostling] [muffled] "Yes, I think so."

"Great! Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall."

[pause] "Yes, it is."

[Hmm. Well, that's interesting. I doubt he would have accidentally turned it off, and I don't want to send him hunting for the power switch because I don't know what kind of monitor he has and it's bound to have more than one switch on it. Maybe the video cable is loose or something.]

"When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one?"

"No."

"Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable."

[muffled] "Okay, here it is."

"Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer."

[still muffled] "I can't reach."

"Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is?"

[clear again] "No."

"Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?"

"Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle--it's because it's dark."

"Dark?"

"Yes--the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window."

"Well, turn on the office light then."

"I can't."

"No? Why not?"

"Because there's a power cut."

"A power--!?!" ...[AAAAAAARGH!]

"A power outage? Aha! Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in?"

"Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."

"Good! Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from."

"Really? Is it that bad?"

"Yes, yes I'm afraid it really is."

"Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?"

"Tell them you're TOO F***ING STUPID TO OWN A COMPUTER!"

 

[AmericanSensei]

I had a customer who came in and told me her mouse was dead. I asked her if she had it with her, but she said she was sure I didn't want to see it. I insisted, and out comes a computer mouse that was very custom. Some genius (or idiot) had taken a stuffed mouse (real) and removed the taxidermy stuff and placed the skin over a wood frame and added electronics. Cool mouse, but the "genius" had also put a vibrator in it (maybe for gaming purposes?) and one day while the customer wasn't home, it must've went off and her cat found it. You know the rest. A realistic mouse vibrating across the desk...Well, eventually it ended up in the litter box along with some regurgitated wires. The cat was a little crazy after that, which I attribute to possible electrical shock.
I was ROFL when she left.

That's taking things literally and making it into something cool. More people need to do that.

Fictional stories are for another thread.

 

[The_Lucas]

This is NOT fiction.