English - 12-year-old AOLer translator

Haha, ill do that for my final essay at school.

Its coming up here soon. Ill emial that to him and give him the real thing. lol
 
here we go....
Original Essay said:
Understanding a complex, and overwhelming book such as The Catcher in the Rye can be very challenging. Understanding the theme of consistency is a comfort factor is a major influence in the concept of comfort will drastically help a reader come to a greater understanding of a book as a whole. Salinger in expressing how humans need consistency to be comfortable. Salinger uses theme many times within The Catcher in the Rye. This essay will assess the theme of consistency is a comfort factor. Holden encounter consistency as a comfort factor throughout the book, and three notable examples are The Natural History museum, The ducks in the pond, and veterans day at Pency.
Holden often made comments about how much he liked a place, and then went on to justify his thoughts with justification that it was always the same. One major example of this was when he was in the Natural History Museum. “The best thing, though, in that museum was that everything always stayed right where it was. Nobody'd move.” (121). Holden is expressing his love of consistency in this passage. He is showing that he thinks the best things in life are always there and always the same. He does not want it to change. He had felt comfortable because of the consistency, because he knew what would be there. He did not go in there, not knowing what would be there, and what it would be like. He know what exactly what to expect.
Holden also expressed concern when he noticed something that was not consistent, like the ducks in the lagoon in Central Park.
“The ducks. Do you know, by any chance? I mean does somebody come around in a truck or something and take them away, or do they fly away by themselves –go south or something?”
Old Horwitz turned all the way around and looked at me. He was a very impatient-type guy. He wasn't a bad guy, though. 'How the hell should I know?' he said, 'How the hell should I know a stupid thing like that?”
“Well don't get sore about it,” I said. He was sore about it or something.” (82)


and now translated:
Translated said:
UND3RSTANDNG A COMPL3X AND OV3RWHELMNG BOK SUCH AS TEH CATCHER IN TEH RYA CAN B V3RY CHALENGNG!1!!!!11 WTF LOL UNDARSTANDNG TEH TH3ME OF CONSISTENCY SI A COMFORT FAC2R SI A MAJOR INFLU3NCA IN DA CONC3PT OF COMFORT WIL DRASTICALY H3LP A R3AEDR COMA 2 A GRE8R UND3RSTANDNG OF A BOK AS A WHOLE!!!1!1! WTF LOL SALNGER IN EXPRASNG HOW HUMANS NED CONSISTENCY 2 B COMFORTABLA!11!1!!1 OMG WTF LOL SALNGER UESS THAMA MANY TIEMS WITHIN DA CATCHER IN DA RYE!!111!!11 LOL THES ASAY WIL ASES DA THEM3 OF CONSISTENCY SI A COMFORT FAC2R!11111 LOL HOLDEN ANCOUNTAR CONSIST3NCY AS A COMFORT FAC2R THROUGHOUT DA BOK AND THRE NOTABLE EXMPLES R DA NATURAL HIS2RY MUESUM DA DUX IN TEH POND AND VATARANS DAY AT P3NCY
HOLD3N!11!!11! WTF OFT3N MAED COM3NTS ABOUT HOW MUCH HE LIEKD A PLAEC AND THAN WENT ON 2 JUSTIFY HIS THOUGHTS WIT JUSTIFICATION TAHT IT WAS ALWAYS TEH SMA!!!1!1! ONE MAJOR 3XMPLE OF THES WAS WHEN HE WAS IN TEH NATURAL HIS2RY MUESUM!11111!1 WTF LOL “TH3 BST THNG THOUGH IN TAHT MUESUM WAS TAHT EV3RYTHNG ALWAYS STAEYD RIGHT WHERE IT WAS!1!!1 LOL NOBODYD MOVA”!!1!! OMG (121)!!!11!!1! OMG WTF HOLDAN SI EXPRESNG HIS LUV OF CONSISTENCY IN THES PASAEG!111!!11! WTF HE SI SHOWNG TAHT H3 THINKS TEH BST THNGS IN LIEF R ALWAYS THEIR AND ALWAYS DA SM3!!11!!!1 OMG WTF LOL H3 DOES NOT WANT IT 2 CHANGE!!1111 OMG WTF HE HAD FELT COMFORTABLE B/C OF TEH CONSIST3NCY B/C H3 KN3W WUT WUD B THERA!!!!1!!1 WTF HA DID NOT GO IN TH3RA NOT KNOWNG WUT WUD B TH3R3 AND WUT IT WUD B LIEK!1!!! OMG WTF LOL H3 KNOW WUT 3XACTLEY WUT 2 EXP3CT
HOLDEN!!1!1!1 OMG WTF ALSO 3XPR3SAD CONCERN WHAN HA NOTIECD SOM3THNG TAHT WAS NOT CONSIST3NT LIEK DA DUX IN DA LAGON IN C3NTRAL PARK
“THE!111!1! OMG WTF LOL DUX!1!11 OMG WTF LOL DO U KNOW BY ANY CHANCE?!!??! OMG I M3AN DOES SOM3BODY COME AROUND IN A TRUK OR SOMATHNG AND TAEK THEM AWAY OR DO THEY FLEY AWAY BY THAMSALVAS –GO SOUTH OR SOMATHNG”
OLD?!!?? OMG WTF HORWITZ TURNED AL TEH WAY AROUND AND LOKED AT ME!1!1!1 OMG LOL HE WAS A VARY IMPATEINT-TYP3 GUY!!!!!111 WTF HE WASNT A BAD GUY THOUGH!!!!!1!1 HOW DA HEL SHUD I KNOW??!!!! OMG WTF HE SADE HOW DA HAL SHUD I KNOW A STUPID THNG LIEK TAHT”
“W3L??!!?! OMG DONT G3T SORE ABOUT IT” I SADE!11!1!!!! WTF LOL HA WAS SORA ABOUT IT OR SOMATHNG”!1111111! OMG WTF (82)
 
Original summary

Summary of "Good Intentions" by "W.W. Jacobs"

A man has 2 women that he loves, and he wants to marry both of them, but he doesn't want any one of them to find out that he has two wives. But he also has an idea to just leave one for the other, but he doesnt want to hurt the other one's feelings. One night, when he decides to go on a date with one, he comes up with a plan that he thought was sure to work. He is a fisherman, so he tells his night watchman of the ship to stay at the ship and make sure that his other girlfriend doesn't get in when he's not there, so he tells the watchman that he is going to a ball or something with one of his girlfriend's, and if the other one were to come by, the watchman should just tell her that the fisherman is not home and he should just send her home. So thinking that his plan would work, the fisherman went on the date with Miss Lamb. Later on in the night, Miss Plimmer came by and demanded to talk to the fisherman, and the watchman told her that they are at a ball at the local theatre or something. She decided that she wanted to go look for him, so she went but the watchman followed her so she wouldn't see that the fisherman with the other woman. While they were all at the show, the night watchman did all he could to prevent Miss Plimmer from seeing the other lady with the fisherman. They finally got kicked out of the ballroom so they had to go back to the boat and wait for the fisherman, but what they didn't know, was that they fisherman and Miss Lamb had already came back from the ball and the fisherman was really angry at the watchman for not staying and sending Miss Plimmer back when she came. Miss Plimmer saw Miss Lamb and they all got angry at each other (the fisherman at the watchman for not staying and making sure that the woman didn't see each other with their man, and both women got angry at the fisherman for cheating on them).

Translated

SUMARY OF GOD INTENTIONS BY WW!11!111!! LOL JACOBS

A MAN HAS 2 WOMEN TAHT HE LOV3S AND HE WANTS 2 MARY BOTH OF TH3M BUT HA DOESNT WANT ANY ONA OF TH3M 2 FIND OUT TAHT HE HAS TWO WIEVS!1111 WTF LOL BUT HE ALSO HAS AN IEDA 2 JUST LEAEV ONA FOR DA OTHER BUT HE DOESNT WANT 2 HURT DA OTH3R ONES FELNGS!!!!1!!11 OMG ONE NIGHT WH3N H3 DECIEDS 2 GO ON A DAET WIT ON3 HE COMES UP WIT A PLAN TAHT HE THOUGHT WAS SURE 2 WORK!!!!1!! OMG WTF LOL HE SI A FISH3RMAN SO H3 TALS HIS NIGHT WATCHMAN OF DA SHIP 2 STAY AT DA SHIP AND MAEK SUR3 TAHT HIS OTH3R GIRLFREIND DOASNT GAT IN WHEN HES NOT THER3 SO HE T3LS DA WATCHMAN TAHT HE SI GONG 2 A BAL OR SOM3THNG WIT ONE OF HIS GIRLFREINDS AND IF TEH OTHER ONE WER3 2 COM3 BY DA WATCHMAN SHUD JUST TEL H3R TAHT TEH FISHERMAN SI NOT HOMA AND HA SHUD JUST S3ND HER HOME!11!!11 SO THINKNG TAHT HIS PLAN WUD WORK TEH FISH3RMAN WANT ON TEH DAET WIT MIS LMB!!!11!!1 OMG WTF LOL L8R ON IN DA NIGHT MIS PLIM3R CMA BY AND D3MANDAD 2 TOK 2 DA FISHARMAN AND DA WATCHMAN 2LD HER TAHT THEY R AT A BAL AT DA LOCAL THEATRA OR SOM3THNG!!1!! OMG SHE DACIEDD TAHT SHA WANTED 2 GO LOK FOR HIM SO SHE WANT BUT TEH WATCHMAN FOLOWED HAR SO SHE WUDNT SE TAHT DA FISHARMAN WIT TEH OTHER WOMAN!1!1!!!1! OMG WTF WHIEL THEY WERE AL AT TEH SHOW TEH NIGHT WATCHMAN DID AL H3 CUD 2 PREVENT MIS PLIMAR FROM SENG DA OTHER LADY WIT DA FISHARMAN!!!111!11 WTF TH3Y FINALY GOT KIK3D OUT OF DA BALROM SO THEY HAD 2 GO BAK 2 DA BOAT AND WATE FOR DA FISHERMAN BUT WT DIDNT KNOW WAS TAHT THAY FISH3RMAN AND MIS LMB HAD ALREADY CME BAK FROM TEH BAL AND TEH FISH3RMAN WAS RILLY ANGRY AT TEH WATCHMAN FOR NOT STAYNG AND SENDNG MIS PLIM3R BAK WH3N SHE CME!1!1111!! WTF LOL MIS PLIM3R SAW MIS LMB AND THEY AL GOT ANGRY AT EACH OTHER (THA FISHERMAN AT DA WATCHMAN FOR NOT STAYNG AND MAKNG SUR3 TAHT DA WOMAN DIDNT SE AACH OTHER WIT THEYRE MAN AND BOTH WOMEN GOT ANGRY AT DA FISH3RMAN FOR CH3ATNG ON TH3M)!1!111 WTF LOL
 
Back
Top Bottom