It is soooooo hard. I have a hard time having any kind of social life. I assure you, your life is better. Work hard and you WILL make it somewhere. You are so morally aware that it is not funny. I am deeply impressed that you are interested in what I say instead of my persona at 18. You have to grow up when your mom kicks you out of the house at 16 and you have to survive. I did it, but it is hard.