Chav jokes

Raffaz

Golden Master
Messages
6,798
Some of these are brill, just sat giggling away to myself.....enjoy! Heres a description of a "chav" for people outside the UK :)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chav

Q. Two chavs jump off a cliff who wins?
A. Society.

Q. What does a chav girl use as protection during sex?
A. Bus shelter.

Q. What do you call a 30 year old chav girl?
A. Granny.

Q. What do you call a chav in a box?
A. Innit.

Q. What do you call a chav in a filing cabinet?
A. Sorted.

Q. What do you call a chav in a suit
A. "Will the defendant please rise"

Q. Why did the chav cross the road?
A. To start a fight with a complete stranger for no reason what so ever.

Q. What do you call a chav girl in a white tracksuit?
A. The bride.

Q. If you're driving and see a chav on a bike why should you try not to hit him?
A. It might be your bike.

Q. What's the first question during a chav quiz night?
A. What you looking at.

Q. Why are chavs like slinkey's?
A. They have no real use but it's great to watch one fall down a flight of stairs

Q. Two chavs in a car without any music, who's driving?
A. The policeman!

Q. How do you get a hundred chavs in a phonebox?
A. Paint 3 stripes on it.

Q. What do you call a hundred chavs at the bottom of the river?
A. A start.

Q. Where do you take a chav girl for a decent night out?
A. Up the ar*e.

Q. Why is 3 chavs going over a cliff in a nova a shame?
A. Because a nova has 4 seats.

Q. What do you call a chav with 9 gcse's?
A. A liar.

Q. What do you say to a chav with a job?
A. Bigmac please.

Q. What's the difference between a chav boy and a chav girl?
A. A chav girl has a higher sperm count.

Also if i have offended any chavs on the forum, then i just have to say, where did ya steal the computer from?? lol :)
 
I don't get the one with the stripes on the phone box...

but the others are hilarious!!
 
lol i didnt get that one either. i do now though lol. theres a few other ones i dont get but cba to list them :p
 
ha lol heres some more
What's the most confusing day of the year for a Chav?
Fathers Day!


How do you start an argument with a chav?
Speak!

What do you call a chav in a tastfully decorated house?
The burglar.

A bus full of Chavs were driving through Wales. As they were approaching Llanfgogogferrinfourasoch they started arguing about the pronunciation of the town's name. They argued back and forth until they stopped for lunch. As they stood at the counter, one Chav asked the blonde employee, "Before we order, could you settle an argument for us? Would you please pronounce where we are... very slowly?" - The blonde girl leaned over the counter and said,
"Burrrrrrrr-gerrrrrrr-Kiiiiing."

What do you do if you run over a chav?
Reverse just to make sure

Why do Chavs always travel around in pairs?
One can read and one can write!

What do you call chavs with a brain?
A crowd.

What do you call a Chav at college.
The janitor.
 
lol that last set had some classics in. ive only heard the burger king one before
 
Haha, that's pretty funny. And thank you for the definition, I've learned something today.
 
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